hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
