careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize
