One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
