you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
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