You're so nebulous sometimes
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
