ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
