no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
