it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize