Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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