between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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