are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
where am i from again
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
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