East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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