she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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