let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
