I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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