i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
