Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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