Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
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