So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
