I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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