Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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