I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
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