If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
