If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
