not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
