Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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