this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
