You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
