I am in a vortex of obligation.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
