You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
