you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
