All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
