The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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