What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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