Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
So squirting runs in the family.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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