her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
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