chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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