Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Randomize
