Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Porn is love you can see.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Randomize
