I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Randomize
