I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Randomize
