If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
