To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
