I need to stop coming to work sober
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
