There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
