yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
