OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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