i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize