he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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