what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
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