And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
50% drunk capacity currently
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
